Union Parents: The unofficial start of summer | May 24, 2024

Memorial Day weekend is commonly known as the unofficial start of summer. While the calendar doesn't turn to summer until June 21, most are ready to start with a summer vibe by now. 

As we anticipate the end of the school year (almost to the finish line!), I thought I'd give a little pre-game show of what you can expect this summer for Union Kids. So, here is what we have in store.

In June, Olivia Hill will be leading our Sunday mornings as we talk about prayer and what it means to pray and why we pray.  The fifth Sunday in June will be a family worship Sunday with no Union Kids in the cafe area.  We will have activities in the main space at tables in the back for kids who are older than nursery age. 

Starting on Sunday, July 7, Sayuko Setvik and I will be leading the Summer Union Kids.  Each Sunday morning, we will focus on a part of Psalm 34.  As part of the lesson, we will be teaching a song based on Psalm 34 to help the kids learn the words and doing activities related to the Psalm.  Second Sundays will continue to focus on creation care projects as well as Psalm 34.

In July and August, the middle school kids will be gathering in the parking lot or Fresh Flours on the first and third Sundays. This time is designed for kids who are in 5th through 8th grades, led by Phil Lewis and team.  Middle schoolers are also welcome to help with the Union Kids activities following the lesson.

On Wednesday mornings through the summer, we will be gathering at parks around the region for outdoor play - organized by our Play & Learn community of toddlers, preschoolers and caregivers.  Elementary age siblings are welcome to join the fun and we'll be posting a calendar with dates and locations soon.  Playdates are from 10-11:30am each Wednesday.

And lastly, if your elementary or middle school child is looking for something to do on Mondays from 10am-12noon, please let me know.  We hope to have a few students help with the (supervised) Monday cooking for ICS.

Well, that wraps up the pre-game announcements.  It's going to be a great summer, I have to say.  I look forward to spending time with your children and can't wait to see the play-by-play of what God will do.

Enjoy the unofficial start of summer this weekend! 


Psalm 34:8-9 (The Message)

"Open your mouth and taste, open your eyes and see—
    how good God is.
Blessed are you who run to him.

Worship God if you want the best;
worship opens doors to all his goodness."

Union Parents: Kids and fire | May 19, 2024

Kids and fire.  That is a combination that never seems to lose it pull.  When the Fourth of July rolls around each year, my boys are always ready to light fireworks or sparkers.  Summer campfires never fail to draw kids - especially when s'mores are involved. We all revel in a warm fire at night in the fireplace when the winter months are dark and dreary. 

Fire is powerful.  It's an element that quickly spreads and changes whatever it touches.  I find it interesting that the Spirit is seen as fire - a power that rests on us as believers.  Megan Prince, fellow Union parent and accomplished artist, was sharing this week how she has also found a fascination with fire as part of her creative work.  Fire is a symbol of power, light, and change.

This Sunday, we celebrate Pentecost and as a symbol of the Spirit's power and presence, Union Kids will place "fire stoles" on Union community members as part of worship during our Pentecost Spanish song.  The stoles are made of ribbons that the children assembled last week. I hope that you will take one or two home with you as a reminder for your family of the Spirit's presence and power.

A friend and I were just talking about how we both grew up with a lack of understanding about the Holy Spirit and the role of the Spirit in our daily lives. Now, we both feel that the Holy Spirit is what keeps us going as parents!  Thank you, Lord!  She shared a part of a creed from the Iona community that is recited each Sunday at her church, which includes a portion about the Holy Spirit that I loved: 

“We believe in God within us, the Holy Spirit of Pentecostal fire, life-giving breath of the church. She is the spirit of healing and forgiveness, source of resurrection, and of life everlasting.”

May the Holy Spirit's power and presence fill our Union Kids (and us!) with hope and fire, like the disciples experienced 2,000 years ago. 
Amen.


Acts 2:1-4 (NLT)
"On the day of Pentecost all the believers were meeting together in one place. Suddenly, there was a sound from heaven like the roaring of a mighty windstorm, and it filled the house where they were sitting. Then, what looked like flames or tongues of fire appeared and settled on each of them. 4 And everyone present was filled with the Holy Spirit and began speaking in other languages, as the Holy Spirit gave them this ability."

Union Parents: Do it anyway | May 11, 2024

Yesterday, I was having a conversation with my friend over lunch.  The topic?  Children and parenting, what else?  She recounted to me a recent seminar she attended - and the big takeaway she gleaned:

Do it anyway. 

Do it anyway. Simply meaning, continue to invite your children into connection, love, activities, even faith, when they may or may not be responding. Do it anyway, because that is what love does.  It invites; it holds space; it doesn't give up.

I take this to heart as I parent boys who are quickly approaching the teen years, as well as my sweet almost-five-year-old.  Don't give up inviting them and loving with my whole being because God never gives up on me. Jesus gives me the strength to do the parenting work because it gives Him joy.

A passage that has been coming up for me over and over lately is John 15:7. "If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you."

This is where the strength comes from - connecting to Jesus for His power and love and ongoing strength.  "Remain in me" is the ultimate invitation.

While Nike might have the Just Do It slogan locked down, I will keep with my Do It Anyway mantra when it comes to parenting because I know I have the God of the Universe in my court as I seek to remain, invite and love. Always.

I Corinthians 13: 4-7 (The Message)
Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have.
Love doesn’t strut,
Doesn’t have a swelled head,
Doesn’t force itself on others,
Isn’t always “me first,”
Doesn’t fly off the handle,
Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn’t revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end.

Union Parents: Bread and juice | April 20, 2024

Tomorrow, we will break bread and take the cup together, as we do each first and third Sundays at Union. Communion is an integral part of our faith journey and experience.   With Union Kids, we have been talking about the people who saw Jesus after the resurrection, it seemed like a natural fit to talk about the meal that Jesus said to share together in remembrance of Him once He returned to the Father.

This Sunday, we will be offering the communion elements to kids in the cafe area and Renee share the words of institution with them.  It will be an ongoing part of the Union Kids time on the first and third Sundays to provide a sacred space for kids to participate in communion with their peers.

If you have any questions or would prefer your children take communion with you as a family, please let me know.  

Matthew 26:26 (NIV)
"While they were eating, Jesus took bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke it and gave it to his disciples, saying, “Take and eat; this is my body.”

Union Parents: Full-fledged otters | April 12, 2024

Otters give me perspective.

They are so entertaining to watch (and believe me they played to the crowd!), but I think what really struck me this week as I saw some otters swim, twist, bob up to say hello, and dive in the water is that they are doing just what they are designed to do.  They know nothing else but to play, swim together, and be curious. They don't have any other agenda  Not a chance. They are simply living out their created design as full-fledged otters.

As I think about my children, they are each so unique - different gifts, temperaments, interests, personalities. This fact sometimes makes it challenging when they can't agree or don't appreciate each other's differences....but I like the perspective that they are doing just what they are designed to do.  Now, of course, Justin, Caden and Jade still need guidance and discipline to grow to maturity, but when I take the view that their uniqueness - while it may confuse or frustrate me at times - is an unfolding God-gift.

While as parents, we often want our children to play a sport that we played, or be good students like we were, or find a musical instrument that brings joy to them and others, or unleash some hidden artist talent.  But they may or may not ever do those things because it might not be in the blueprint for their particular lives. No ifs, ands or buts. 

It can (but not always) be hard to accept that our kids have their own paths.  But maybe appreciating our children's uniqueness is an opportunity to see God's character in a new way.  A chance to let go of expectations and be curious like those delightful otters because God delights in us and our children just as they are: full-fledged creations.

Psalm 139:13-14,16 (The Message)
Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out;
    you formed me in my mother’s womb.
I thank you, High God—you’re breathtaking!
    Body and soul, I am marvelously made!
    I worship in adoration—what a creation!
Your eyes saw my unformed body;
    all the days ordained for me were written in your book
    before one of them came to be.

Union Parents: Where is that device?! | April 4, 2024

Where was that Nintendo Switch??   Caden and I could not find it anywhere in the house.  I looked and looked until I started to feel a little desperate. I'd looked in all the regular places, how could it been hidden so well?  So, I started to pray - just because I was so frustrated with myself, not because I really wanted Caden to play video games. 

"Where is that thing?!  You know where it is, God, give me a hint.  Help me to remember."  

As I continued to look, I started thinking that maybe God wasn't going to help me or care about an electronic device and would just let me flounder around in frustration.  I figured it was my fault, after all.  As I searched high and low, slow other thoughts came to mind...like how many times He'd answered prayer before, often in a different way than I expected. 

Out of the blue, Caden said, "It's in the van, remember?"  And sure enough, it was.  The mystery was solved, but it was not lost on me that the answer had come in another way other than my efforts.  I did get an answer.  The lost was found and I was heard. 

I needed a boost on Wednesday morning. I was tired and sought some encouragement. "I need a word, Lord," I quietly said, more to myself than out loud.  Psalm 13 popped into my head and its words brought the encouragement I needed.  

Psalm 13:5-6 (NIV)
But I trust in your unfailing love;
    my heart rejoices in your salvation.
I will sing the Lord’s praise,
    for he has been good to me.

So, not once, but twice this week, I received a tailor-made, Spirit-led answer because the Spirit is truly that close and that present.   Even if it's as inconsequential as a lost device, I'm heard.

This week, I've been listening to my Lectio 365 app, and the focus has been the Holy Spirit: the advocate, counselor, and comforter. Jesus says that the presence of the Holy Spirit is even an improvement to having Him on earth.

"The Holy Spirit is the daily, felt, experiential presence of God, who will never leave me nor forsake me. The indwelling Holy Spirit means that the places I feel weak today not have to be hidden and covered up but should be exposed to prayer to the God eager to help."
-Lectio 365

I needed that reminder this week that God is eager to help...and does.  That the Spirit is close and answers. Maybe you need it, too.  

What's on your heart?  Are you wondering if the answers are coming or if what you need is really available as you navigate parenting and life?  Sure, there are times in parenting when it is all going smoothly and then there are those dreaded times when it's a dumpster fire. With lots of medium times in between.  No matter what is happening, this remains true: The Spirit is present, close, listening, active and ready to speak life into your soul, your life. We have the the gift of advocate, counselor, and comforter from moment to moment, step by step.  

Think of that temporarily-lost Nintendo Switch, and remember we are found and heard. 

John 14:16-18 (New Living Translation)
"And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate, who will never leave you. He is the Holy Spirit, who leads into all truth. The world cannot receive him, because it isn’t looking for him and doesn’t recognize him. But you know him, because he lives with you now and later will be in you. No, I will not abandon you as orphans—I will come to you."

Union Parents: How did Mary do it? | March 29, 2024

How could Mary do it?  How could she stand at the foot of cross and watch her Son suffer immense pain?   Did her mind go back to the day the angel brought her good news that she would carry the Savior of the world (Luke 1)?  This seemed all wrong. It wasn't supposed to be this way at all.

Like Mary, I often feel the ugliness of the world turned upside down and grieve for ourselves and for our children.  School shootings, natural disasters, bullying, disappointment, health problems. It wasn't supposed to be this way.  And it really wasn't, but it is.

Mary watched and wept as saw Him take that last breath and cry out, "It is finished."  She was a parent, after all. It must have ripped her heart just as the curtain in the temple was torn in two.  

Then, nothing, but the beating of her own heart. Did she hold hope that God would make a way?  Did she give up?  Did she feel more alone than ever in her life?  How did Mary endure this day?

Do we cry out, "Where are you, Jesus?", when it's not going as expected.  We say,  "You have done great things before, why not now?"  With heartbreak, we wonder why our children suffer.  With fear, we ask, are we forsaken?

On Good Friday, we wait, we wonder, we suffer.  We are out of answers, lost, afraid. Mary felt it.  We feel it.  

But blessed are those who mourn, for Mary and us will be comforted, because we are not forsaken by the One who broke suffering's crippling power.


John 19:15 (KJV)
"Now there stood by the cross of Jesus his mother, and his mother's sister, Mary the wife of Cleophas, and Mary Magdalene."

Union Parents: Friendship we crave | March 22, 2024

Yesterday, as I drove Justin to school, we talked about some of his friends - several which he has known his entire life. These are kids that I trust and know are good people to be in his life.  As we were talking, I recounted to him a message he received in a birthday card (that I saved) from one of these friends a few years ago. It said:

"Thank you for the being the best friend a person could want."

That is gold to me.  To see my son thriving in friendship and for being reliable and trusted.  Good friends are not a given, but they are a gift.

And many kids today don't receive that gift, or worse, they receive bullying. Your child (or even you as a child!) may have experienced bullying, as our family did last school year. Thankfully, we received support from the school and it's been remedied, but that is not the situation for everyone. I wanted to ask you to pray for a family that is connected to Union who is experiencing intense bullying and it's flat out wrong and damaging.  I'm so thankful to report there have there been Union community members who have stood up for this family.  They are not alone in the gap.  Please pray for the young people who are involved in this situation - that good will prevail, healing will occur, and friendships could be restored.

I'm so thankful for the work here at Sundays (and beyond!) that Kathy Foster, Olivia Hill, Chandra Jamerson, Grace Lee, Halle Morgan, Summer Lee, Linden Beeman, Jim Boonyaratanakornkit, and others who lead at Union Kids are doing to show children and young teens what friendship looks like.  What belonging looks like.  What Jesus' love and friendship looks like.

How do your kids experience friendship?  Is it something that comes easily or feels more challenging?  Can Union support you in any way? Here is a list of books about friendship for younger kids that was complied by a retired Shoreline Public Schools librarian and a staff bookseller at Secret Garden Books in Ballard.  Maybe one of these books look good for bedtime reading:
https://www.parentmap.com/article/books-that-teach-early-readers-about-friendship.

As we approach Holy Week, I am reminded that Jesus made it clear to His disciples, you are my friends. He demonstrated that unbreakable friendship to the very end and continues to be the trustworthy friend that we all crave. 

After Justin and I talked about the birthday card, he said, "Can I see that card again?"  Those words feed his soul and he knows it.  Jesus is that kind of friend to us and to our kids: the best friend a person could want.

John 15:15 (NIV)
"I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you."

Proverbs 17:17a (NIV)
"A friend loves at al times..."

Union Parents: Field notes from the Quarter / March 15, 2024

This winter, we embarked on a new adventure called the Union Family Quarter - a five-part series of gatherings designed for our community to grow together in connection, possibility, and resiliency.  

To be honest, we didn't have a map.  Just some big ideas that just kept bubbling up and expanding.  So why did we do this - something new and unproven? Checking back in my notes, we had three intentions:

• Developing greater COMMUNITY so that we all feel supported in this journey, and not alone. It is our goal to build bridges between the home and our faith community, and with one another. This is deeper than just a connection; it's a shared journey with one another.

• Offering POSSIBILITY with new growth opportunities through learning, resources, nourishment, and vitality.

• Fostering RESILIENCY for families, caregivers, and those who advocate for parents and children so we can better withstand the tough stuff of life, find ways to make repairs, and be flexible along the journey.  This allows us to more fully be who God made us to be. 

Phew!  Those were big goals but notably worthy of pursuing. 

And as I have participated in each of the three previous events, it has humbled me to realize how much I need to learn and how grateful I am for this community and the learning  we get to share together.  

The 2024 Quarter will come to an end next Sunday with our last gathering led by Dr. Jenny Lee Vaydick. As a follow up, I will email a survey to get your field notes, thoughts, suggestions, and critiques of the Union Family Quarter.  All feedback will serve a guide for a new set of gatherings in early 2025.

My personal field notes are peppered with thankfulness, hope, and an overflowing excitement about what is happening within our community.  Thank YOU for participating and a HUGE thank you to Renee Notkin, Renée Sundberg, and Phil Lewis who have truly made this endeavor toward greater community, possibility and resiliency a reality.  To God be the glory!  

See you on Sunday!

Ephesians 1:15-18 (NIV)
"For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all God’s people, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people,"

Union Parents: The good work of creation care / March 8, 2024

This Sunday is a Second Sunday and it's been just over a year since we started focusing these Sundays on tangible ways to care for the world and be people of justice.  It's been our desire to show kids how they can join with God aa a world changer, harbinger of hope, and a steward of the earth. Creation care work helps kids to connect to the good work of "exercising dominion" well and caring for what God called good.

This week, Olivia, Kathy, and our Union Kids team will start working on tending a garden at 415 Westlake with the help of our kids, as well as making a delicious tossed salad for the Second Sunday meal. These endeavors care for our earth and feed our community.

What about engaging kids in creation care other days of the week at your home?  You may not have a green thumb or space for a garden, and that's ok.  You and your kids can also try some other creation care, like this suggestions from author,  Meredith Miller:

• Picking up trash in your neighborhood while on a walk.  Just make it a habit, rather than turning into a full clean up day.

• Compost your food scraps (which many of us already do).  Maybe even create a compost or worm bin in your own yard to enrich the soil.

• Become members of a zoo or aquarium, an animal conservation group, or a botanical society to better understand what the challenges and opportunities there are when it comes to stewarding our world.  (I have joined the Washington Farmland Trust.)

• Listen to a conservation-themed podcast for kids like Earth Ranger Emma or watch PBS Kids' Wild Kratts to learn more about the amazing creatures that God has created. These can inspire kids (and adults)! 

Our Union Kids are often already thinking about these things and we take our cues from them many times.  You may know that both the communion glasses and reusable coffee cups were both instituted from requests by Union Kids to be more sustainable. This is creation care.  

This is good work, worship in action on a Second Sunday and many other days of the week.  I'd love to hear what other families like to do to care for our earth. Ideas are welcomed!
 

Genesis 1:11-13 (NIV)
"Then God said, “Let the land produce vegetation: seed-bearing plants and trees on the land that bear fruit with seed in it, according to their various kinds.” And it was so. The land produced vegetation: plants bearing seed according to their kinds and trees bearing fruit with seed in it according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good. And there was evening, and there was morning—the third day."

Genesis 2:15 (NIV)
"The Lord God took the human and put them in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it."

Union Parents: It's recorder season / March 1, 2024

Apparently, Lent is also recorder season.  If you haven't experienced the power of this plastic instrument, you will have the pleasure one day, I'm fairly certain. Elementary teachers have this ear-splitting curriculum built into every school.

So, I'm currently being serenaded with squeaks, blasts, and tweets that roughly sound like the Imperial March from Star Wars.  My blood pressure shot through the roof  - and will return to normal when my musician grows tired of making "music". 

The recorder is a perfect example for me of what reality is present during Lent. - joy in affliction.  We love our children - and we'd love them for them to play a tune on that thing and know if will come someday, but in the meantime, it is  a act of love not to run for the hills. We know that going through these days of musical torture will yield at least one decent song at the spring music concert and the chance to see your child smile big with accomplishment.

As we journey through Lent and embrace this season, there is a term called "Bright Sadness" that has often been given to this time.  It is joy in affliction or difficult feelings -  the longing for the fulfillment of our hope. It reminds us of the joy set before Him as He endured the cross. It is the now and not yet.  

As parents, we find joy in the seasons that bring challenge or hardship. While some stages can be fun and enjoyable, other stages and times of learning may leave you wondering if you can hold on.  But we do - we hold on, anticipating what good thing is yet to come. 

If you are up at 2am nursing a baby - it's the now and not yet as you anticipate a full(er) night of sleep. If you are hoping that your child will pick up their clothes and put them in the laundry - it's the now and not yet of learning responsibility. If you are watching the first year of soccer, it's the now and not yet of seeing those kids work as a team and not just move in a giant huddle of shin guards and cleats. And if you seeing your child struggle in any way, it's the now and not yet of moving through this stage and growing into more maturity or proficiency.

The bright sadness we acknowledge in Lent reminds us that we await the fulfillment of our hopes (for our lives, families, community and world), but we are not abandoned in the now.  We are beloved.  What does this term "bright sadness" stir in you?

Thankfully, the recorder has now been put away until the next practice sesh. This musical hardship is part of the parenting journey and part of the joy.  


Hebrews 12:1-2 (NIV)
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

Union Parents: The humbling self-checkout line / February 23, 2024

There is something extremely humbling and exposing about the self-checkout line. Like you are on stage.

As the line of shoppers builds behind the checkout, you search various packaged goods to find where is that hidden bar code to scan, or you hear the jarring announcement to "please place the item in the bag", or you face the struggle to quickly unload your cart from top to bottom while impatient people with one item in hand watch your every move.

For me, that self-checkout line can be a humbling experience, even if I am trying my best. I'm left wondering how the cashiers do it so fast and effortlessly. Parenting has that same effect, too - humbling and exposing and leaves me wondering at times.

In this season of Lent, I'm reminded that we as parents are often stripped of what we hold on to, even as we try our best. Jesus tells us that sometimes all we can do is hold on to the Father (because that's all we really have anyway).  

This past week, I watched an episode of Season Three of The Chosen where Jesus instructs His disciples to go outto the countryside and share the good news, two by two, but with the caveat to take nothing - no clothes, food, money, or sleeping bag. When the disciple push back on this plan, "Say what??", He explains, "I'm teaching you to rely on the Father."

As I sat with the weight of Jesus' words, I thought how appropriate this felt for parenting, too.  Relying on the Father. 

Like the self-checkout line, we are humbled by the process of parenting and find that we are struggling to do it well. I know I am. As we are striped of our own devices - by children who are different than we are, the challenges of parenting in our culture, unexpected circumstances that we are unprepared to weather - we are really only left with one tool:  prayer.  If you are like me, you are humbled to pray for trust, wisdom, help, patience, and for our daily bread.

But the Jesus goes with us and before us, we are gently asked to trust Him in parenthood. Because Jesus understand the challenge of relying on the Father as he humbled Himself unto death on a cross.

So, the next time you are going through the self-checkout line, maybe pause and remember God's trustworthiness even in this humbling journey called parenting, called life, our God is there, helping lift the load and push the cart.   

Psalm 25:4-5 (NIV)
Show me your ways, Lord,
    teach me your paths.
Guide me in your truth and teach me,
    for you are God my Savior,
    and my hope is in you all day long.

Union Parents: When God ran / February 16, 2024

This Lent season we are focusing on embracing God's love for us and seeing how we are embraced.

As parents, we often don't receive the reciprocal love or care that we shower on our children.  It's just not the role that kids play - they sponge up the love we give and that's how they grow into healthy, adjusted people (eventually).  We have to get our love from Someone else.  We need that supernatural love embrace to keep going.

When I was a teen, there was a popular Christian music song called "When God Ran".  It's truly in the 80s contemporary Christian genre - so the music might not thrill you - but the lyrics always touched my heart.  When God ran.  When the Father saw the son way off in the distance, He didn't wait for the son to approach.  He didn't even walk down the driveway to meet him at the mailbox.  He ran.  He embraced the son and showered him with love and acceptance, forgiveness and hope.

This Sunday, we'll be talking about the Prodigal Son story and I hope you'll see it as an encouragement to you when the parenting gets hard, when the pre-teens want their way, when the little ones just need you so much that you are drained, when you just aren't sure you have any more to give. God runs to us in all our circumstances, faith or doubt, in all we do or not do - and embraces us with the biggest hug and kiss.  

Have you been hugged by our God today?

Luke 15:20 (New Living Translation)
So he returned home to his father. And while he was still a long way off, his father saw him coming. Filled with love and compassion, he ran to his son, embraced him, and kissed him.

Union Parents: Ordinary ways & everyday therapies / February 9, 2024

This past Monday night, we were able to hear from Laura Benton, M.S., LMFT, as she spoke on Contending for Connection: Fresh Vision for Youth Mental Health. It was a great time to learn from a mental health expert, who had a wealth of good information to share about a current and emotional topic.

As she talked, Laura encouraged us that very simple, ordinary things are an opportunity to create connection. She said that this mental health crisis moment can be a time to see things differently and be a turning point for hope. We have the opportunity to help our youth create a bigger story for their lives.  

Hope can start with some ordinary measures like this that create connection:
- Communicate openly and honestly, including about your values
- Spend time with your child in shared activities
- Guide children to make healthy, wise decisions
- Help with homework
- Volunteer at your child's school

Then building on that, you can help your child move from dis-regulation to regulation by weaving these everyday therapeutic practices into daily life:
- Connection to family and community
- Movement - exercise, yoga, running, dance, walking, etc.
- Breathing and meditation
- Spiritual practices like prayer, worship, journaling, hiking, meditating
- Sleep - getting enough!
- Screen-free time
- Practicing scripture

Mental health is a complex issue and there isn't often an easy answer around the struggles we all face.  So, maybe just a few some baby steps toward connection and emotional regulation is all that's possible.  That's okay!  As Laura said, we have this opportunity for a change, for hope, for a new outlook. Exploring these ordinary ways to connect and everyday therapies to move from dis-regulation to regulation that Laura shared can show our children that they are seen, known and accepted. That they belong and matter.

Union Parents: Nuggets of encouragement / February 2, 2024

This past Sunday was our Worship in Action Sunday and 415 Westlake was humming with projects, people, food, connections, and prayer.  Have you been to a Fourth Sunday before?  It's a great space to let kids belong before they believe and to find meaningful ways to contribute. Let us know if you or your kids have an idea or project we could weave into our Fourth Sunday mornings. We love new ideas!

Following Worship in Action, parent coach Kelly Hampton presented on Parenting Wins - How to Develop a Mindset that Sets You Up for Years to Come. What an encouraging time it was to learn from her wisdom.   Kelly encouraged parents to slow down (unless someone is bleeding or broken), take time to interact with kids when there is a challenge, and reflect back to them how they are feeling so you can move to a connected and calmer place. She says she tells herself this mantra every day.

And if you didn't have a chance to hear Kelly, we will have her back, so stay tuned for the next workshop details. (One parent who attended said she could listen to Kelly every month!)  Also, her power point slides can be accessed in the link above if you'd like to flip through them for more of her nuggets of encouragement. We are not alone!

Union Parents: Meredith Miller coming this Monday! / January 17, 2024

How do we know God and discover that God can be trusted? 

That is the question Meredith Miller, author of Woven: Nurturing a Faith Your Kid Doesn't Have to Heal From, is asking around faith formation in families and our faith communities.

Whether we are trying to help kids and teens anchor to who God is and have faith practices that are rich, textured, and all their own, or we, as adults, are trying to embrace and share a faith that is so much bigger, vital and resilient than the list of rules we were taught as kids.

You are invited to come, learn, and bring your questions 
about nurturing the kind of faith that can flex and grow, be broken and repaired.

Meredith can also address topics like:
- When are kids ready to participate in church?
- How do we guide children toward making a decision for God?
- How do you navigate different faith approaches within family relationships?
- What do we do with hard scripture and how do we teach it to kids?
- How do you parent in a pluralistic culture?

This is for not only for families with children and youth, but is also for the whole Union community as aunts, uncles, godparents, grandparents, educators, volunteers and those who are invested in the future generation and church!

I am looking forward to Monday and hope I'll see you on Zoom from 7:30-9pm!  
Please register for Meredith's presentation here.  You may also submit your questions through this link:
https://unionchurch.breezechms.com/form/4bb4c2

Union Parents: Parenting wins with Kathy and Kelly / January 12, 2024

You may recall that I had the opportunity to speak to some Union parents on a Fourth Sunday this past fall and  ask, "What's on your mind?" I heard parents say things like, 

"I need support!"
"How do we make our family thrive?"
"Knowing how to de-escalate tantrums would be helpful."
"Sibling fights are so hard."

You, too?  This is why I'm thrilled for our Union Family Quarter #2: 
Parenting Wins - How to Develop A Mindset That Sets You Up For Years To Come
Presented by Kathy Foster and Kelly Hampton 

Here's a little more detail about what you can expect from the session.  Hope you will join us on January 28 following worship.

In parenting, there is a constant tension between the positive characteristics we want our children to possess and the struggles we see our kids experience. We want our kids to be kind, but they yell at their siblings. We want to raise problem-solvers, but they steal other kids' toys when they don't get their way. We want our kids to be responsible for their stuff, but they never pick up their toys. 

There is wonderful correlation between the struggles our kids experience and the characteristics we hope to grow in our kids. In this 1- hour workshop, we will explore how the two are connected and how we can use that to help shape our parenting. How we think about conflict directly impacts how we react to the struggles we have with our kids. You will leave the workshop with a new framework that will propel you forward in your parenting decision for years to come. 

About Kathy Foster:
Kathy Foster has more than 30 years of experience as an early childhood educator and parent educator.  She expertly leads Union Kids on Sunday mornings  and the weekly Play & Learn program at 415 Westlake.

About Kelly Hampton:
Kelly Hampton has been a passionate educator for over 15 years. Most recently she was the co-founder and director of a preschool hosted in the Ronald McDonald House providing preschool services to patients at Seattle Children’s.  She is currently a first grade teacher with the Edmonds School District. In 2022, she launched Kelly Hampton Coaching to support and empower moms, dads, and caregivers to become the parents they want to be by harnessing more playfulness, connection, and balance with their kids. She uses a strengths-based approach to help her clients clarify their family values and live into them.

Union Parents: Welcome to Union Family Quarter / January 5, 2024

Welcome to 2024!  As we settle into this new year, I'm excited to share with you this upcoming series called Union Family Quarter.  

Born out of a collective effort to listen to what parents and our Union community need, this series is designed to encourage and support us as we build hope, strength and resiliency together. This "winter quarter" of education will cover a variety of important and relevant topics that we hope will create conversation and connection within our community and beyond.  Some topics will be more applicable to your situation than others, so you can use this series as a menu to engage with what resonates with you,

Here is the lineup for your reference:

Meredith Miller
Author of Woven: Nurturing a Faith Your Kid Doesn’t Have to Heal From 
A Discussion on Faith Formation
Monday, January 22 | 7:30-9pm | Zoom

Kelly Hampton and Kathy Foster
Parenting Wins - How to Develop a Mindset that Sets You Up for Years to Come 
Sunday, January 28 | 11:30am -1 2:30pm | In-person
(childcare will be available)

Laura Benton, M.S, LMFT
Contending for Connection: Fresh Vision for Youth Mental Health
Monday, February 5 | 7:30-9pm | Zoom

Panel Discussion Moderated by Phil Lewis
Journeying with LGBTQ+ Youth as Family & Community
Sunday, March 17 | 11:30am - 12:30pm | In-person
(childcare will be available)

Jenny Lee Vaydich
Associate Professor of Psychology, Seattle Pacific University
Conflict in the Home
Sunday, March 24 | 11:30am - 12:30pm | In-person
(childcare will be available)

If you have any questions at all, please don't hesitate to reach out at tsharon@unionchurchseattle.org.  
I'm looking forward to this journey with you!

I Thessalonians 5:11 (NIV)
"Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing."

Union Parents: Free on January 22, 2024? / December 29, 2023

The new year is just around the corner and I’m getting excited for 2024 to arrive. 

One reason is that Union will be hosting a speaker - Meredith Miller - that I think is very dynamic in terms of faith formation. Meredith is the author of Woven: Nurturing a Faith Your Kid Doesn't Have to Heal From, a book I've referenced a few times this fall.

Not only does she address issues like moralistic therapeutic deism, she provides guidance on how to provide kids the space they need to explore the Bible, ask big questions, and even change their understanding of God and faith along the way.  This approach can help children anchor to who God is and have faith practices that are rich, textured, and all their own.
 
If you are like me, you desire to share your faith and love for God with your children, but don't necessarily want to do it in the same way you were taught. As Meredith shares, we hope our kids see that God is so much bigger than the list of do’s and don’ts. Her faith formation work is important for parents, families, youth and really anyone who's grown up in the church. This is a time that is designed to encourage and support each other as we build hope, strength, and resiliency together.

I hope you'll mark your calendar for January 22, 2024 at 7:30pm-9pm.  And if you'd like to submit a question to Meredith in advance, she will prepare answers for the Zoom call, as well as have a live Q & A time following her presentation.

For more about Meredith Miller, here is her Instagram account:
https://www.instagram.com/meredithannemiller/

If you'd like tp purchase her book in advance, here is a link to the publisher's preferred site:
https://www.hachettebookgroup.com/titles/meredith-miller/woven/9781546004356/

Union Parents: Interrupting the dark / December 22, 2023

We have been exploring Jesus' birth as the great interruption in our lives with disturbing words as our Advent focus at Union. 

As Christmas approaches, I have appreciated this prayer by Henri Nouwen and  I've listened to it daily this week - reminding me of the light of Jesus breaking into the darkness of our world and the hectic nature of our daily lives.

Lord Jesus,
Master of both the light and the darkness, send your Holy Spirit upon our preparations for Christmas.
We who have so much to do seek quiet spaces to hear your voice each day.
We who are anxious over many things look forward to your coming among us.
We who are blessed in so many ways, long for the complete joy of your kingdom.
We whose hearts are heavy seek the joy of your presence.
We are your people, walking in darkness, yet seeking the light. 
To you we say, "Come Lord Jesus!"
Amen.

May the tender mercy of our God shine and guide us all along the path of peace as live, love and parent - because we know that Jesus brings us into the light of God's love.  We are interrupted for good.  Merry Christmas!

1 John 2:8b (NIV)
"...the darkness is passing and the true light is already shining."